Fearless Living
11 Jun
Thousands of years ago, when we were hashing it out with big-toothed cats, our fear response made perfect sense.
When trouble loomed, our internal systems leaped into action. Our breathing sped up, our hearts pounded, our attention snapped into focus. We were on heightened alert, tingling with anxious anticipation. Everything was seen through the filter of danger, of a potential threat to our survival.
As I said, it worked well back in the day. But when our daily threats changed from big cats to the big presentation, those responses weren’t as helpful.
Our bodies are wired for our past, keeping you average in the present.
Doing work that matters, following your passions, changing your ways, stepping up and doing the right thing…these can be frightening experiences. As such, they set off your fear responses. Your brain is telling you you’re in danger and so you back down.
You stay right where you are, where your brain thinks it’s safe. Sure, you’re unhappy, stifled, bored, and settling for a sub-par life, but you’re safe. Or so your prehistoric brain thinks.
This is no way to live. Imagine what you could do–would do–if you weren’t afraid (Of the non-threats, of course. If a bear is eating your lunch, be afraid).
You’d start that business instead of making excuses. You’d pitch your idea instead of researching just one more day. You’d launch that blog you’ve been thinking about instead of talking yourself out of it, once again. You’d be the person you’d look up to instead of fitting in and fading out.
The old response is keeping you from the better life that’s just around the corner. Below are a few tips to help put that knee-jerk reaction in check.
1. Give It a Name: The fuzzier it is, the bigger it seems. A vague feeling of dread is like a fog: it expands and surrounds us. The actual issue might be small and unlikely, but as that vague feeling it seems unbearable.
The antidote? Define it. Write down on a sheet of paper the details of what scares you. What, exactly, do you think is going to happen? And why, exactly, does that scare you?
Nine times out of ten, you’ll realize the big fear is actually a small matter. And, just like that, the “threat” will be stripped of its worrisome sting.
2. Reframe It: This is a good one. In his book Iconoclast, author Gregory Burns, M.D., Ph.D., outlines the mind of those men and women who aren’t afraid to do the unexpected, the unfamiliar, the outrageous (and courageous). One of the things that set them apart is how they reframe their bodies response to fear.
The average person feels the butterflies in his stomach and says, “I’m nervous. I’m freaking out. I can’t do this.”
The iconoclast feels the same butterflies and says, “I’m ready.”
They take the same responses and mold them into a different story. They give fear a different meaning. It doesn’t mean danger or a time to back down. The heart beating, the palms sweating mean they are stepping up and doing the right thing. It’s a sign that they’re doing something that matters.
They take the cue and take action.
3. Tire It Out: Studies have shown that our brains can’t stay afraid for an extended period of time. It’s such an intense reaction, it gets tired. So, when you do the thing that scares you, those crazy feelings won’t last forever. You body will adjust. You’ll calm down.
Knowing this in advance, you can tell yourself that you might feel incredibly anxious now, but it won’t last for long.
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Want more help? I stumbled upon this great Web site that I know you’ll love. It’s an online magazine of sorts, all geared toward helping you beat down the fears that keep you paralyzed.
You can get their latest issue here: http://fearlessstories.com/
That’s all for now.
Talk soon,
Jason
Dear Jason
Thank you very much for inspiring tip.I also want where the mind is without fear!
Thanks for the article, simple down to earth tips
Inspaired me too much. Thank you.
Thank yo very much for your inspiring tip.
Thank yo very much for your inspiring tip.
Thank you!!
Dear Jason,
Thank u for the tips….it really helped me a lot
Thank you, Jason! Very inspiring!
Defenetly inspiring!
No fear from now on
Dear jason,really it’s helpfull,thanks alot.
Hi Jason – thank you for sharing this information – it really is awesome.
Jason, I’ve got another reframe for you. Say you’re going to do a presentation and suddenly your heart starts pounding, and your hands get a little damp, and your stomach starts churning… did you know that these same things happen when you’re excited? So, instead of thinking about the fear you feel when you think of the presentation, think about the excitement. Or you reframe the whole thing from being out of your comfort zone as being in your excitement zone.
it’s a great method for us to overcome the obtacles faced every day,though fearness itself is not a bad thing all the time
Very well written… This is actually one of feelings which everybody has before incepting something big but nobody speaks about it.
Thanks for sharing
Yes it’s good and well written. Depth Psychology.
Very helpful tips thank you.
It’s a good piece of advice……
I LOVE THIS TIPS, VERY MUCH ENCOURAGING, KEEP IT UP
i love this article so much so keep the good work up.love to see more of it,many of your reader has be encouraged through your writing.God bless you
I REALLY APPRECIATE YOUR TIPS ARE VERY HELPFUL,KEEP IT UP!!