A Lesson in Confidence from Conan O’Brien
12 May
Confidence is a game changer.
If you feel—no, if you’re convinced—that you can do what you set out to do, you think differently. You feel differently. You act differently.
You’re not afraid of taking risks, not afraid of stepping outside your comfort zone. You’re not held in check by what others might think of you. You’re not frozen by the thought of making a mistake or trying to be perfect.
You become an entirely different person, someone who knows what they want and knows how to get it. It’s a good place to be.
But how do you get there?
Truth about Confident People
If I’m really tall, you may feel short. (I’m not really tall, so no worries.) If I’m hilarious, you may feel not so funny (that one is true). And if you look around and see effortlessly confident men and women, you may feel as though you don’t stack up.
Not a real confidence boost.
Fortunately, there’s a hidden truth that can turn this insecurity into hope.
Though we assume confident people are born that way (and in turn that we have no chance of matching their coolness or chutzpa), the truth is that many outgoing, charismatic people learned to be outgoing and charismatic.
Which means you can too.
A Rocky Start
“No matter what I accomplish, they’ll be bringing up those early tough times,” superstar comic and soon-to-be late-night host on TBS Conan O’Brien told NPR. “If a giant meteor was headed towards Earth, and I quickly constructed a rocket ship and flew out there and deflected the meteor, saving the Earth from certain destruction, the headline would be O’Brien saves earth, after rocky start.”
What he’s referring to is the beginning of his late-night career back in the early 90s. He was, as one critic put it, “a living collage of annoying nervous habits.” It was clear to anyone who watched that O’Brien was out of his element, awkwardly struggling with inexperience in front of the camera.
But there was a good reason.
It turns out that O’Brien’s greatest fear was performing comedy in front of a live audience. To beat the fear, he took it head on. And the result? He’s now considered one of the funniest men on television, not at all out of his element or uncomfortable with the limelight.
The same critic who prattled on about his annoying habits eventually wrote that O’Brien was “one of the greatest examples of a self-makeover in television history.”
What Conan Taught Us
So we have two lessons here: First, tackle what scares you. It’s a sure way to rid yourself of the anxiety and paralysis that accompany fear. Second, if an insecure, awkward, bumbling rookie can turn into a comic juggernaut, you can too. (Well, maybe not a comic juggernaut, but certainly a more confident person.)
Like any skill, it doesn’t matter where you are now—you can always get better. You can transform yourself into cool, calm, and collected, always comfortable in your skin and happy to engage with the world.
For simple tips to make that happen, stay tuned for our next Motivation123 QuickTip in your e-mail inbox!
