7 Life-Changing Decisions You Can Make Today

28 Jun

I used to think changing your life required big, tangible actions…things you could see and hear and feel.

But I was wrong.

The important changes don’t happen outside–they happen in our heads. First we decide, then we act.

So today I wanted to offer 7 decisions you can make, right now, that will set in motion the changes you’re after.

#1. Enough is Enough

Decide that enough is enough. All the problems you’ve merely dealt with, all the times you’ve settled for less than you really
wanted–no more. Enough is enough.

You’re not going to waste another month, week, or day living a life you don’t want.

Or, if things aren’t all bad, you’re not going to put up with the areas that are dragging down the rest.

#2. Bump Up the Standards

Decide that you’re going to raise your standards. People’s lives are a reflection of their expectations. If you expect to quit
when things are hard, you’ll quit. When you expect to find a way out of every dire situation, you’ll find it.

I worked with a friend who often came in late, clothes disheveled, moving at half speed. When that same friend left for a
similar position at a competitor, he came in early, looked sharp, and gave full energy.

The difference? Standards.

The first employer didn’t expect their people to be on time or looking good. The second company would accept nothing less. As soon as he walked through the door for his new job, it was made clear that the standards were high. So he met them.

#3. No More Excuses

Decide that you’re no longer going to make excuses. I cannot tell you how many times I hear empty excuses to cover up inaction. If
you’re alive and kicking, you can do something about the things you want. No. Matter. What.

But the second you make an excuse, all hope is lost. You’re not going to pinpoint the real problem, you’re not going to take real
action. You’re just going to hide behind a reason you know, deep down, is a lie.

Refuse to fall back on excuses. If things are going to change, you are going to change them…regardless of the obstacles.

#4. Team Effort

Decide you’re going to work with others. You’re an achiever, which is why you’re reading this. But that doesn’t mean you have
to do everything alone. You most certainly should not.

You are one person with one mind and one perspective. Add just one more person and you’ve doubled them all. This is no small
feat. When you decide to attack your goals in a team, you’re drastically increasing manpower and brainpower.

Most important, you’re bringing in new perspectives that will see the world–and your goals–in an entirely new light. This
opens the door to a host of solutions that you never would have considered.

Ask for help. Listen closely. Return the favor.

#5. Good Enough to Get Going

Decide that good enough is good enough. Reading a book isn’t that hard. It’s definitely not scary.

Googling and Yahooing isn’t hard either.

And that’s why millions of people endlessly research their goals instead of actually achieving them. They’re trapped in an endless
loop of avoidance, learning more and more about what they want but never taking a real step toward it.

Stop it. When you know enough about your goal to do something about it, do it. Don’t wait to read one more article. Don’t buy another book.

Roll up your sleeves, rub your hands together, and get to work.

#6. The Magic Pill

Decide that you’ll stop looking for the magic pill. Changing your life isn’t a mystery. There is no grand secret locked away in a
dusty volume of the shelves of an old monastery in a far away land.

Yes, there are thousands of tips and tricks to help you on your way. And there are great programs to offer guidance and structure.

But, in the end, it comes down to doing what needs to be done.

That can never happen if you continuously seek out the magic pill to your problems. Instead of making things happen, you’ll just
hop from fad to fad, wasting your time, energy, and money.

There’s no magic pill, so decide to stop looking.

#7. When is a Good Time?

Decide that you’re going to start now. The longer you put off acting on your goals, the smaller the chance that you’ll follow
through. It’s like a pot under running water: the longer you wait, the heavier and harder the task.

The step doesn’t have to shake the earth. It just has to happen. Now.

So tell me, what is one small thing you can do to move a step closer to your goal?

Do it.

People Who Get What They Want…What Are They Thinking?

17 May

Imagine being able to choose any outcome and automatically feel motivated to make it happen.

No matter what’s standing in your way, you’d be so driven that you would blow right past it. You would get what you wanted every
time.

Sound too good to be true?

I thought so too, until I learned a basic truth about the way we think and act.

The Undeniable Fact of Life

We do what we do for a reason.

In other words, some kind of reason, whether good or bad, is at the root of everything we do. To the average person, this doesn’t mean much, but you’re not average.
If you asked ten people on the street why they want to change or improve their lives, I have no doubt that you would get a whole
lot of, ‘Huh? Um…I’m not really sure. I guess I never thought about it,’

or…

‘Because it would make me happy.’

Sorry, but that just isn’t good enough. I said we do what we do for a reason, but not just any reason. It has to be a good one, a
powerful one. When you put a weak reason behind any goal, it’s not going to happen.

‘It will make me happy,’ isn’t strong or specific enough. It doesn’t excite or inspire. Taking into account the way our mind works, this is never going to move you to action.

And this is why so many people keep wishing for a better life instead of enjoying one. They don’t have good enough reasons behind
their goals.
So what’s the answer?

What Can I Do to Succeed?

Develop better reasons!

It’s that simple. If I told you that walking across the room would radically change and improve your life in an instant – and you
truly believed it – I guarantee you would be moving your feet right now.

Why?

Because the reason moved you to action. It was powerful enough to make things happen.

And that’s what you need to do when it comes to your own ideas of a happier, more successful life.

Think of yourself as a master storyteller. The better story you tell about what success will do for you, the faster it will happen.

When you sell yourself on what you want, you’ll effortlessly and automatically be driven to make it happen.

And it all starts with a good reason.

So take some time right now to think of at least three great reasons why your goal is worth achieving. Make them specific,
powerful, exciting, and inspiring.

The Story of Ben Johnson

10 Dec

Ben Johnson snapped awake in a cold sweat, his heart pounding in his chest.

He looked to see the time – 3:14 AM.

It was at that moment that his life would never be the same.

New Year’s Eve was right around the corner, and, to celebrate the occasion, Ben went to dinner with a few close friends downtown.

After finishing their meals, someone brought up the topic of resolutions. And, soon enough, they were taking turns describing
their hopes for the coming year.

When Ben’s turn came, he listed a handful of changes he wanted to make, and as quickly as the topic started, it was over.

But it would soon return.

That night, at 3:14 AM, the revelation that woke Ben was this: his list of goals for the new year was identical to last year’s.

Nothing had changed.

While most people would laugh off a repeating list of resolutions, Ben didn’t find it funny.

It was terrifying.

He knew that the life he always thought would be his was slowly slipping away…that ‘someday’ fairytale was fading fast.

An entire year had passed without a single goal achieved. Not one. Finally, he accepted the fact that nothing would ever change
unless he broke the pattern.

Nothing would ever improve unless he did committed to doing something different, something massive.

This was just the fire Ben needed to stop planning for a better life and instead do something about it.

You need to do the same thing.

Rarely does life change for the better while we’re not looking. We make it happen.

But we’re scared. And we’re comfortable.

That may be true, but even more unsettling than change is regret. You may be scared,  but years from now you’ll be filled with
disappointment and pain for missing out on the chance to really live.

You may be comfortable with your routine now, but eventually you’ll realize time has run out to do the things you’ve always
wanted to do.

Your life will never be what you want it to be if you don’t do something about it.

Don’t sit and think. Don’t brood. Don’t consider the possibilities.

Get up. Shake off the dust. And get to work.

Because if you put your goals off another year, chances are almost certain you’ll do it for the rest of your life.

31 Thoughts to Think

1 Dec

1. You already know what you have to do.

2. You are capable of far more than you think.

3. There will always be a thousand reasons to not do something.

4. Your time is not necessarily short, but it is certainly counting down.

5. The pain of regret will quickly outweigh the pain of failure.

6. Your THING is found through experience, not waiting for a knock at the door.

7. Give yourself a break.

8. If there is more than one way to skin a cat, there is more than one way to achieve your goal.

9. It is not going to kill you.

10. The point of life is not to fit into an acceptable, normal, attention-deflecting mold.

11. You have already accomplished far more than you realize.

12. One small act in the right direction can change everything.

13. Things could be better, but they could also be worse.

14. Your problems may not be your fault, but there is no doubt the solutions are your responsibility.

15. People have done far more with far less.

16. You are going to remember the times you passed on an opportunity longer than the times you tripped chasing it.

17. Someone has done what you now want to do.

18. If it does not scare you, you are not trying hard enough.

19. Change does not require months or weeks; a few, intelligently-used minutes will do.

20. Do not wait until it is perfect–it never will be and never has to be.

21. Do something different.

22. Things do not get better–you do.

23. Your life is not going to change while you are sitting on the couch.

24. You will never get rid of every butterfly in your stomach.

25. There will always be something else that has to be done.

26. Be happy for today, hopeful about tomorrow.

27. The average overnight success is ten years in the making.

28. Give to get…or just give.

29. Happiness is less a result of having than of helping.

30. Do not overlook the everyday miracle.

31. You can wait all you like; time and opportunity will not.

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What would you add to the list of important thoughts to think? Let us know in the comments below!

7 Scientific Secrets to Erase Your Stress

24 Nov

Stress, tension, frustration…ever experience these?

Silly question, I know.

We all feel stressed from time to time; it’s part of being human. And we certainly feel frustrated.

But as common as these feelings are, there are simple things we can do to ease them, even erase them in some
cases.

Seven such gems are below.

Create a CD of Your Favorite Songs

Listening to your favorite music not only takes your mind off of your worries but also reduces blood pressure and a rapid heart beat.

Because music is so closely tied to memory, listening to music brings to mind happy memories, which in turn affects the part of the brain that regulates these and other automatic physical responses.

So make a list of your 15 favorite songs, visit an online music store to download each one, and create your very own stress-busting CD.

Control Your Breathing

Stressful situations lead to short and shallow breathing, which in turn leads to an increased heart rate and creates feelings of tension and anxiety.

To reverse these effects and reduce your stress, completely empty your lungs with a large sigh. Then, breathe in deeply from your belly on up, hold your breath, and exhale slowly. You may want to follow the 4-7-8 rule. (4-second inhale,  7-second hold, 8-second exhale.)

This simple exercise sends better oxygen content to your cells, improving your health and ridding yourself of the tension and stress.

Laugh

Studies by Dr. Lee Berk and Dr. Stanley Tan have found that laughter ‘lowers blood pressure, reduces stress hormones, increases muscle flexion, and boosts immune function.’

It also triggers the release of endorphins, which act as the body’s natural painkillers and produce a sense of well-being.

The lesson? Laugh! Expose yourself to humor as often as possible through jokes, funny stories, comic strips taped up in your office, or anything else that makes you laugh.

Make Your List

Even though you may not realize it, there are most likely specific situations that cause stress time and again. By putting your finger on exactly what they are, you can begin to fix or avoid the things that constantly add stress and tension to your life.

Get out a sheet of paper and a pencil. Begin by thinking back to stressful times and what specific things caused them. Then, keep the list handy for two weeks and record the cause of any stress you experience during that period.

After two weeks, create a master list of stress causers and spend time thinking of specific remedies for each one. The solution may be as simple as taking a different route to work or getting up fifteen minutes earlier to handle tasks in the morning.

Focus on Now

Thinking about the next ten items on your list of things to do is enough to cause anyone stress. That’s why it’s vital that you focus on only one thing at a time.

Allowing only one task into your thoughts at a time – the one thing you are involved with right now – will improve your productivity, decrease mental mistakes, and relieve your mind of feeling overwhelmed as well as your body of feeling physically stressed out and drained.

Hold a Pencil between Your Teeth

A recent study at the University of California found most people have a set of ‘smile muscles’ which, when activated, send signals to your brain that you are happy. In turn, your brain releases the chemical that register happiness.

In fact, you don’t even need to personally feel happy at the moment to create the internal response of happiness.  Simply holding a pencil between your teeth can be enough to trick your brain into thinking you are happy and releasing the corresponding chemicals into your system.

Wake Up with the Sun

You’re sound asleep and dreaming peacefully. And then, out of nowhere, you’re shocked awake by the screeching of an buzzing alarm. It’s easy to see why such a routine can get things started off on the wrong foot.

Instead of being startled every morning, try using natural light to wake you up. Studies have shown that the light of dawn alerts your body to wrap up your dreams, raises your body temperature, and begins releasing the hormones you need to function throughout the day.

So leave the blinds open tonight and wake up with the sun. (Afraid of oversleeping? Keep an alarm nearby set to five minutes after your normal wake time. This way, if the sun doesn’t do its job on day, the alarm will.)

The Science Behind Breaking Habits – 3 Tricks

8 Oct

Breaking a habit can be as hard as staying awake in an 8:00 A.M. geology lecture. It is, nevertheless, possible. (Or so they say; I could never stay awake in that class.) Perhaps it would have been easier had I followed the doctor’s orders.

1. Recognize Your Triggers. Our habits are often prompted. Dr. Wendy Wood, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Duke University, put it this way: “If you regularly eat chips while sitting on the couch, after a while, seeing the couch will automatically prompt you to reach for the Doritos.” The couch becomes a trigger.

With this knowledge in hand, the shame- filled snack lover has a new weapon of attack. Instead of relying on willpower to resist the chips, he or she can stop the urge before it strikes by sitting in a different spot–or selling the couch.

2. Snap Yourself. Whether it’s biting nails or drinking soda, we do bad things for a reason. Though it might be hidden, there’s a reward milling around there somewhere.

Brian Wansink, Ph.D., author of Mindless Eating, offers simple advice to take advantage of the fact. “Habits,” he says, “become that way because they provide value to a person.” To change the habit, take away the value.

Here’s his tip: Put a rubber band around your wrist. Every time you engage in your negative behavior, snap it–and snap it hard! (Well, not too hard.) Simple as it sounds, it works. According to Dr. Wansink, “It’s a quick way to pair non-reinforcing behavior with the behavior you want to stop.”

3. Hang in There. If you’re trying to start a new habit, for example jogging every morning, Monika Fleshner, PhD., has good news. If you can force it for two or three weeks, habit will soon take over the heavy lifting.

Here’s the science: When you do something such as exercising, something that makes you feel good when you’re through, neurotransmission of dopamine is increased.

(Dopamine, if you don’t already know, is associated with the pleasure system of the brain. It produces feelings of enjoyment, which motivates the action that triggered it and helps to form a habit.)

The more you exercise, the more you get chemically rewarded. After two to three weeks, your brain will actually crave the activity. You’ll be eager to exercise.

Share Your Goals? Think Again.

29 Sep

We’ve all heard the advice: to achieve your goals, share them with others.

While there are pros to this advice, surprising evidence (dating as far back as 1920) reveals that it might actually hurt your chances of success.

Derek Sivers explains it all.

Want to Get Motivated? Ask 1 of these 36 Questions.

22 Sep

Do you want to know the secret to getting motivated?

Like, the real secret?

Reasons.

We do what we do for a reason. It’s not necessarily logical. It could be something as rational as staying in a bad relationship because you think no one else will love you.

Absurd, of course, but still a reason.

So if you want to get motivated, you have to attach the right reasons to the things you want. Do it well enough and you’ll feel that urge to act…the holy grail of personal change.

How do you come up with them? There are several options, but one of the most effective is asking questions.

Today I’m going to give you 36.

Don’t rush. Don’t skim. Seriously think about the questions and how they relate to your goals. The deeper you dig for the core answers, the more motivated you’ll be.

How will working toward and reaching your goal affect your happiness? How will you feel about yourself? How will you feel about life in general? Will it affect your moods and attitude? Will it give you peace of mind? Excitement? Hope?

How will working toward and achieving your goal affect your intelligence? Will it require you to learn new things? Broaden your perspective? Understand previously confusing concepts?

How will working toward and achieving your goal affect your health? (This is obvious for health-related goals, but reasons revolving around health play a role in many, many areas. Think of the stress that comes from a struggling marriage and the relief that comes from fixing it.) Will success give you more energy? Will it reduce or eliminate disease? Will it make you live longer?

How will working toward and achieving your goal affect your family? Will it give them more safety and security? Will it make you into a smarter/stronger/better father or mother? Husband or wife? Will it strengthen your marriage or your bond with the kids?

How about your friendships? Will it give you more free time to spend with them? More opportunity to help them?

How will working toward and achieving your goal affect your job? Will it open doors? Will it lead to a raise or promotion? Will it secure your position in the company? Will it give you the chance to strike out on your own?

How will working toward and achieving your goal affect your money? Will it give you more? Will it ease financial worries? Will it make a comfortable retirement possible? Will it make donating to charities, causes, and people easier? Will it save your house? Marriage? Sanity?

These questions skim the surface. Because you know your goals better than anyone, you’ll be able to dig deeper and ask more pointed questions.

But the key is to start asking questions.

As you do, the compelling reasons you need to feel motivated will be yours.

21 Absurdly Simple Motivation Tricks You Can Use Right Now

8 Sep

Image: healingdream / FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Move

Go for a walk. Jump up and down. Run into the middle of the street (no, don’t do that.)

It’s been said a million times, so this makes it 1,000,001. When we move, we feel better, think better, and do better. If you want to get something done, start moving.

Break It Down, Again and Again

Everyone says break down your goal. I’m different. I say, Break down your goal, and then break it down again! (I know, I’m a wizard with this stuff.)

Goals are about change and change is scary. So people hesitate, forget, and move on. But not if you make the step forward small enough. In that case, the discomfort is lowered to an acceptable level and you actually do it. So break it down, again and again.

Never Wait for Permission

If you’ve been with me for a while, you’ll remember that I gave you permission to do whatever you wanted to do a few weeks ago. So this one is for the new readers…or the old ones with terrible memories.

People want someone, somewhere, to say it’s okay. They need reassurance that their ideas aren’t ridiculous. Do they really need it? Of course not, but they feel they do. So they wait for someone to give permission, and waiting is the enemy of progress.

Just in case you’re one of the waiters, here you go: I grant you permission to go forth with your crazy idea and have a wonderful time doing it.

Do It for Me (or Someone Else)

People like people. Not all people, of course, but we’re social creatures. We need companionship, conversation, connection. Let’s be terrible humans and use this to our advantage.

If you aren’t changing for you, do it for someone else. Think about how a better you will help you mom or dad, your husband or wife, your son or daughter. What will your success bring into their lives? (An example to follow? Security? A happier you?)

Get Around the Right People

The old adage: If you want to be rich, hang out with rich people. (Insert your goal in place of ‘rich,’ and the adage is all yours.)

When you spend time with people who have what you want–as opposed to merely reading about them–you can’t help but pick up a little of their mojo. You see how they think, how they interact with people, how they work through problems, how they respond to chaos. In essence, how they do what they do.

And when you do what they do, you get what they got.

Avoid the Wrong People

Franklin said it best: He that lieth down with Dogs, shall rise up with Fleas. In other words, the tip above works just as well in reverse. If you spend time with the wrong people, they’ll rub off on you.

We are genetically programmed to fit in. Otherwise, we’d be kicked out of the tribe and starve. So when good people are part of a bad group, they are motivated to join in and be accepted as one of the gang (which explains why gangs are so powerful). Avoid this risk. If your circle of friends includes people doing things you don’t want to do, make a change. Create some distance. Or run.

Mess with Your Routine

Routine is a killer…of hopes, dreams, and spontaneous dance sessions. It’s like a sopping wet blanket draped on us at all hours of the day; we drag ourselves, zombie-like, from one routine to the next. We’re not really living, just dragging.

You need to break out of this.

Do something different. Instead of coming home and flopping onto the couch, come home and flop onto your bike. Instead of hopping on Facebook at the start of the day, donate to a charity online. Instead of doing what you always do, do something different.

Never Wait for the Idea

Are you waiting for the idea to hit you? To punch you square in the nose, maybe sometime next month? Reality check: it won’t.

Whether it’s your life purpose or just a new hobby, people sit around and wait for the right idea to strike. “I’m not sure what I want. It’ll come sooner or later.” Bet on later.

You have to do things if you want to figure out what’s right for you. Join clubs. Read books. Meet people. Do, do do. Then you’ll know, for certain, which things are for you and which are for someone else.

Do One Thing

I’m working on a new book for you. Well, it’s an updated version of an old book. And it’s not just for you, but for everyone in our little community. (But mainly for you.)

This project is part of a long list of things I need to get done. As such, it’s not getting the attention it needs. What I need to do, and what you need to do with whatever you have to accomplish, is focus on finishing one thing. Not dabbling in dozens. Just one.

Push aside e-mail. Push aside television. Push aside all the little things that eat away at your time like a hungry caterpillar on a sunny day. Focus on getting one thing done, from start to finish. Then, when it’s complete, you can move on. But not until it’s done.

(I’ll take this advice in a moment, but if I followed it now the post would be over already.)

What is the Worst Thing?

What’s the absolute worst thing that will happen if you go for it and screw up? At first it might seem as though dreadful things will occur. The stock market will crash. Your car will explode. We’ll discover the moon isn’t made of cheese.

But, when you look at the facts, you quickly realize the worst case isn’t actually that bad.

Your life won’t be over if no one likes your novel. You won’t risk everything if you take that trip to Australia. You won’t pass out if you give that presentation to the board.

What is the Worst Thing? (Part 2)

Same question, different idea.

What’s the worst thing that will happen if you wimp out and give up before you even begin? Think bad, really bad. The more horrifying you make this picture, the more driven you’ll be to make sure it never happens.

(A smoker shouldn’t imagine wasting hoards of money or having trouble finishing a walk up the stairs; he should imagine leaving behind a family shattered, a loved one taken by cancer too soon.)

What is the Best Thing?

What is the absolute best thing that is going to happen when you finally reach your goal? As with the tip above, the bigger you make this possibility, the more motivational juice it will have.

Tips within a Tip: When you have your idea, write it down on paper and put it in a place you’ll see often. Then find pictures to represent that idea. If you want to be a philosophy professor, for example, you might find a picture of a cavernous lecture room. This image will automatically bring to mind the joy you’ll feel as you walk into your own classroom, dozens of seats filled with smiling faces eager to learn. (Hey, it’s your vision, so you can fudge the facts a little.)

New, New, New

Do something you’ve never done before.

Go Big

I know it’s cheesy–and I’m no fan of cheese–but the idea has some merit. If you aim high, you’ll make some pretty incredible things happen. Here’s why:

We aren’t excited about easy tasks. Tie your shoes today? Do a happy dance when finished? I didn’t think so. (If you did…well, congrats.) What excites us are true challenges. We love to be pushed, to overcome, to be victorious in the face of untold obstacles. It’s part of our chemistry.

We also love big ideas. They inspire. They fill our heads with hope. They motivate.

So think big.

DEADline

Choose a date on which to finish or your idea is as good as dead.

As a species, we can generate excuses faster than anything on earth. I’m flabbergasted at how quickly people churn out an endless stream of reasons why they can’t do something about their goals. Yes, flabbergasted.

We’re geniuses at rationalizing, so we have to be on guard against our own crafty selves. Deadlines are one way to do that. Put a concrete date on an idea and the wishy-washy concept becomes a real thing.

Instead of digging up excuses for procrastination, your brain looks for ways to finish the work by the end date.

Not Ready? Do It Anyway!

It doesn’t have to be perfect. This one idea could change your life forever.

Smart people from every walk of life run into this: they have an idea, learn about said idea, and, then, they learn a little more. Then a little more. Then a little more…then a little more.

It’s the good ol’ paralysis by analysis.

They put off actually doing the real work because learning about it is so much more comfortable. No real progress is made, but it sure feels like they’re doing something. They just keep learning, waiting for the moment when they know everything, when their plans are guaranteed to work flawlessly.

No more. Good enough is good enough. That video you want to put on your blog that has bad lighting? Get it up. That script you want to show your friends but has a few holes in the story? Show them. That dance routine you want to try out at the place where they do dance routines? Just dance.

The most important thing is to do it. You can fix it, tweak it, change it, scrap it later. But nothing happens until you put your idea in action. No more waiting, no more studying. Do it.

Realize (Part 1)

You know that thing you really want to do?

No, not that one. The other one.

Yeah…that one.

Someone else has already done it. Realize that means you can do it too.

Realize (Part 2)

You have the opportunity right now. You can finish reading this post (all the way to the end!) and do something about your goals or ideas. That’s right now. Tomorrow…next week…next month? Who knows.

There are no promises. Realize that what you see today might not be there tomorrow.

I suggest acting when you can. (That’s right now, but not until you’re done reading.)

Realize (Part 3)

Realize the plateau you hit may not be a sign to quit. It might be the dip, Seth Godin’s term for the hard part of the process that divides those who can’t hack it from those who stand above the crowd as truly special, as rare.

Quit

Having said that, sometimes it’s not only okay to quit, it’s the best possible choice.

When you know you’re heading down the wrong path–and not just a difficult stretch that challenges you–get out. There’s no sense in sticking with a goal that isn’t right for you, just as there’s no sense in reading a bad book to the end (though I feel that tug every time).

Life is too short.

Quit when it’s wrong, stick when it’s right.

Help!

Don’t do it by yourself. Find people who know more than you do. Reach out. Get help.

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Now it’s your turn. What’s your most effective motivation tip? Let me know in the comments below and we’ll get this conversation rolling.

Want to Know Your Purpose? Try the Sticky Test

2 Sep

The thought of having a passion is exciting.

You’ll feel alive and useful. You’ll be eager to act and grow. You’ll love your life.

Sounds good. What’s more, it’s true.

But that doesn’t make finding your passion any easier. We might all agree that it’s an exciting idea, but few people know their purpose.

They–you–need the sticky test.

Waiting for the Bug to Bite

Here’s the problem: people treat passion like a cold; they wait for it to catch them.

Wait around long enough and you’ll stumble upon ‘your’ thing.

People do it all the time, but does it make sense?

You can’t wait for the answer. That’s not how it works. You have to do something. You need the sticky test.

(I know, second time I mentioned it without telling you what it is! Your patience has paid off. It’s up next. : )

The Test

The answer, as with most things like this, is simple.

The only way to find out what interests you–or what lights you on fire–is to try it. You have to put yourself in the mix of things and see which ideas…wait for it…stick.

(I told you it was simple.)

You have to do things, a lot of them, and see how you respond. It’s the only way to know for sure what your path is.

You can sit and think for years, trying to mentally work through your talents and strengths and values, trying to match them to activities and interests. (And still be completely wrong about what connects with you.)

Or you can get up, join in, and do stuff. Then see how it goes.

I Knew It

I know what you’re thinking. You wanted some amazing insight or grand discovery. But I have a question: if the solution is so simple, why aren’t you doing it?

Why aren’t you constantly trying new things?

Why aren’t you writing or blogging or dancing or drawing or racing or climbing or teaching or reading or crafting or painting or playing or speaking or leading or helping or singing?

If you are, congrats. Ignore me and keep going.

If you’re not, why?

Better yet, when are you going to start?

The Bottom Line

We’ll only know what we’re passionate about when we try it and see how it makes us think and feel.

You can’t guess. You can’t just think. You definitely can’t wait.

You have to jump in the waters of many lakes.
Cal Newport of Study Hacks recently wrote a post about this topic for the popular blog Zen Habits. His thoughts sum things up perfectly:

In other words, discovering passion requires a dedication to unstructured exploration. You have to leave large swathes of free time in your schedule (a technique I call underscheduling), and fill this time with the exploration of things that might be interesting. Of equal importance, when something catches your attention you must leverage your free time to aggressively follow up.

As Caldwell’s research reveals, true passion can’t be forced. You can participate in personality tests and self-reflection exercises
until you drop from exhaustion, but it’s unstructured exploration coupled with aggressive follow-ups that most consistently leads people to a life-consuming interest.

Do a lot. See what sticks.